Your time at sixth form can often feel overshadowed by the approaching UCAS deadline. Alongside learning the content for your A levels, you’re also encouraged to attend open days, finalise your chosen subject, and prepare for the next expected chapter that is university. Your teachers and tutors mean well, of course, yet there’s a lot of pressure to live up to your own potential, and the academic expectations of the college too.
But what happens when you don’t feel ready for this next step? What if you don’t have the grades for your chosen course? Or what if you just want to explore life away from education for a bit? Well that was the exact position I was in.
Between the ages of 16-18, I was dealing with a family matter, as well as my own crippling anxiety and hypervigilant episodes. I knew I’d never open that envelope to find the grades needed for my top choice course at my top choice university. So I didn’t apply for it. I instead looked into taking a gap year, and applied for a job at a local accountancy firm.
(There’s more about my A Level exam saga in my post here if you’re interested).
This gap year I took ended up being five in the end. I used it as an opportunity to not only travel and work, but to also build up my qualifications again. I started with a HNC Business course at my local college, then studied an online Access to HE course in Mathematics at the University of Aberdeen. By the time I was 23, I had received the grades needed to embark (finally!) onto my university endeavours. I had made it. I had the opportunity to attend the University of Glasgow to read a joint degree in Mathematics and English Language & Linguistics – try finding a longer degree title! I’d never felt as proud of myself than I did that day. Everything was confirmed. My course also allowed for elective subjects, and I was able to study both French and Computer Science during my time there too!
Leaving home properly for the first time, I was eager to get stuck into my new academic chapter. Having already travelled the world for months at a time during my academic break, I knew I was capable of being independent, and adapted well to the whole living away thing. I was really good at creating acquaintances with people too. But I’m not going to lie, returning to full time education, after 5 years out of it, was a shock to the system.
I noticed the difference in maturity levels from myself and the 17/18 year olds. Making proper friends was never a huge ‘must do’ priority for me; as I came to realise my introverted ways made me very happy and content on my own anyway. But I did happen to find a small group of people to study with during tutorials and seminars which was really lovely. We were never close enough to meet up outside of class – again, the age difference often felt larger than it was – but it was some familiar faces to see in the classrooms and lecture halls each week at least.
I will note that I did later come to understand the importance of friends, and ended up making my best ones outside of university – I will forever be thankful to Glasgow for connecting me to some truly wonderful people!
Anyway, back to university itself, and I also joined the Mature Student Association which was a society that provided not only a place to study (away from the hustle of the main campus), but also social events with students a little bit older. I will admit I didn’t actually attend these parties due to anxiety, but I loved that the option was there nonetheless! It’s something I’d highly recommend if your university offers this kind of society; it’s the perfect opportunity to meet likeminded older students with life experiences under their belts, and much more focused goals in terms of study, and university life.
When choosing halls of residence, I opted for an off-site private student accommodation, and requested a floor with older/master students also. This meant my flat comprised of 6 of us (all twenty-somethings) so I, at least, could be confident knowing they already knew how to keep communal areas clean, and keep noise down to an acceptable volume during certain hours etc. We each had our own things going on, but we were all very civil with one another, and I feel very lucky to have shared my first year with them. I then went on to stay in a private rented flat for the rest of my residency in Glasgow, which I felt very grateful for as it really provided that split between life-life and university-life.
Now I’d love to tell you I went on to get that degree and graduate with high marks, but I never actually made it to the end (due to personal reasons). But I can say I left Glasgow with my CertHE qualification at a distinction grade, and that in itself was a huge achievement for me. I still hold so much pride over it because I know even finishing my first year, had I tried at 18, would’ve felt so out of reach.
My time at university taught me more than academic lessons. I grew and developed more than I ever could’ve expected.
All of this to say, I’m glad I didn’t rush into university at 18. I know I didn’t have the personal skills, the mental stability or the confidence to properly throw myself into it. I can’t exactly say I threw my entire self into it at 23 either, to be fair, as I did very much stay to myself quite often, but what I can say is that I never once regretted my decision to go as a mature student. I learnt so much about myself during the time, and it really opened so many doors professionally too.
I think perhaps had I had the support I do now, back during my university time, I could’ve just maybe finished those 4 years, and obtained that full honours degree. But hypotheticals are easier than reality, and a lot of life can change in 4 years. Either way, I know I’m glad I went when I did. I will forever be thankful to everyone at the University of Glasgow for being so accommodating, supportive and allowing me the chance to prove myself to myself. I was better than my A Level grades. I was capable of more than I ever thought possible.
Leave a Reply